So here I am filling you in again about my short film stint which took place, just before we all broke up this December- I guess I’m still buzzing over the whole thing!
As I’ve mentioned before in another post, I’d been thinking about doing something like this for about two years, before I picked up the phone and did it; this had nothing to do with being ‘perfect’ but it had everything to do with being right, and in those couple of years nothing seemed right.
I knew I just wasn’t hitting the right note, I must have taken down a handful of videos from my youtube channel, because I really wasn’t doing myself any justice by representing a half baked, seen this somewhere before, crappy imitation of someone else’s crappy imitation….And if I’m honest that’s exactly what I was becoming. It wasn’t that I was consciously copying, but I was definitely regurgitating a sort of hand me down and in short it wasn’t good enough.
I’m finding out the more I represent myself, the more I’m challenged to explore who I am, and sometimes I don’t know who the hell that is, I only know what my gut says.
I don’t want to fall into a vacuum of nothingness, of following the herd, and doing stuff just because everyone else is. I want to do stuff that I frickin love! Even if it looks as if I’m hugging myself in a corner like some weird teenager, acting out what it would be like to kiss a REAL person lol.
I don’t know how these shorts will turn out, bollocks, they won’t be perfect that’s for sure. But they felt right at the time, and they feel right now, so I guess nothing else really matters.
So that thing called perfect can ‘do one’ and fudge right off, I really haven’t got the time for it.
Bring on 2015 ;-]